Tuesday, June 8, 2010

A Heard Man Is A Happy Man

No, I'm not talking about a shepherd man with a staff and sheep!  :)  I'm talking about a man whose wife (in this case, yours truly) really listens when he talks, and therefore is able to grow in wisdom and bless her husband with her eager attentiveness.  

I just realized recently that I wasn't doing a very good job of this.  (Yet another thing to add to my ever-growing "In Need Of Improvement" list :0 )  I will admit, not everything that my husband brings up in conversation is right up my alley.  To be honest, I really don't care about golf, or the mechanical qualities of the riding mower, or the proper way to install a drop ceiling.  But when we met, I would have loved nothing more than to discuss the intricate details of any of these things for hours, just to be together with him and hear his sweet voice.  That was before the kids and the housework; before real life!  

I didn't even realize it was happening, that I was beginning to slowly but surely brush off his attempts to communicate with me simply because it wasn't what I was interested in.  What I didn't realize was that to him, my actions were portraying a picture that I didn't care about him.  Have I felt the same way when he didn't seem interested in what I had to say?  Absolutely.  Still, the effect my nonchalance was having on him remained safely out of the view of my blinders, just where the enemy liked it.  

When I finally realized that my husband was talking to other people a lot more than me, it hit me that something wasn't right.  I just recently came to the conclusion that I would have to quit being selfish and insensitive if I wanted to gain my husbands friendship back, and though I still fail regularly, lately our communication has been much stronger and our relationship more fulfilling.  Last night, we talked till almost 3 am like we used to do 4 years ago.  Makes for an early morning for sure, but a happy husband and a good marriage are worth losing a little sleep over once in a while! 

I've found that if I can cheerfully remain engaged in conversation in his area of interest, that our conversation can really take off into many delightful and satisfying directions.  

When I strive to bless my husband I am blessed in return.  And that's some good stuff :)

Let the wise listen and add to their learning, and let the discerning get guidance.
Proverbs 1:5

 This post is linked to Living By Faith-To Love Their Husbands Tuesdays.